Teen Titans Rulebook
by IThinkInPoetry
Summary: Rules of the Teen Titans, and one-shots of what happens when they are broken.
1. Inital

**A/N: I promised myself that if I was already working on a fic, I would not upload something that was not related to it. But hey, that's what I said about doing this when I have homework, and guess who should be writing an english essay? This is a re-upload of a Teen Titans Rulebook one-shot I posted a while ago, which was taken off because it was a "list". Now, with each rule/group of rules having its own one-shot, I no longer have to worry about it being a "list". Will be uploaded irregularly. Ideas for other rules are welcome. The funny chapters start after this one, but feel free to read it anyway.**

** Disclaimer: If I forget to add this, does that mean I own them?**

** Guy: No.**

** Me: Shoot.**

They were going to do it. They had put it off for as long as possible, but they could no longer ignore what was necessary. It had to be done, and it was

their responsibility as the leader and "vice leader" to do it (as second-in-command of the original Titans, Cyborg should've been helping, but this was one situation where he was happy to leave it to his two friends).

"We need a rulebook." Robin said solemnly.

Bumblebee nodded, equally serious, tapping her paper with her pencil.

"So, where do we start?"

"I guess first we state the obvious and work our way down."

*later that day*

The team leaders taped the finished list of initial rules to the front of the fridge (the only vertical surface that every member looked at at least once a day).

At the top of this list, the two had put the rule that they saw as the most important.

_1. Read each of these rules before entering a Titans tower or outpost._

*three days later*

The leaders had taken the list down, replaced by a much longer one, some of the additions including the note beneath the first rule and a new second rule.

_Note: Using this list as a dartboard does not count as reading it._

_2. Each of these rules are up here for a reason. Please do not take the liberty of scribbling out the ones you do not like._


	2. Chores

**A/N: Some rules will be funnier on their own. Others are just too hard to write for. These rules will come before the one-shot of each chapter. Read them. They are probably funnier than the actual one-shot.**

** Disclaimer: *holds up a pumpkin* This is my friend Pie. He owns the Teen Titans. He's also Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, and a squirrel. ****_NOT._**

_3. If Speedy asks for help pranking Bee, kindly keep your offer to yourself._

_4. If Beast Boy wants help pranking Raven, studies show that avoiding both Titans for the rest of the day is beneficial to your health._

_5. Hiding Beast Boy from Raven is the right thing to do. Not recommended, but the right thing to do._

_6. Help with the chores in whatever tower you happen to be staying in._

It only took one look at their tower to know that Titans East had just weathered a major attack. If the state of the tower was not enough proof, then Speedy's cast-bound position on one of the sick-bay's hospital beds and Aqualad's unconscious form in the nearby medical water tank was.

However, the fact that Bumblebee was standing in front of the fridge up in the Ops room, slashing angrily at the taped-on "rulebook" with a pencil mostly explained the tower's current state.

_ Note: refilling the TE's pool with laundry detergent/fabric softener/dishwashing liquid/any kind of polish/anything classified as a cleaning solution does NOT count as a chore, and will result in two people (Aqualad and you) earning a stay in the Med-bay._


	3. Gender

**Disclaimer: Already said.**

The Brotherhood of Evil had just been defeated, and the Titan's celebration party was in full swing, with "Beast Boy's Team" (the name that Beast Boy, Mas, Pantha, The Herald, and Jericho had been collectively given) were the unanimous guests of honor.

Jinx and Kid Flash were standing a few feet away from this very group, chatting casually.

"Is it bad that I think there should have been more girls in that group?" Jinx asked, nodding at the afore-mentioned five.

Kid Flash blinked.

"Huh?"

"Pantha is the only girl in that group. Beast Boy, Mas, The Herald, and Jericho are all boys."

Kid Flash looked at BB's Team, then his eyes widened as he turned back to his pink-haired friend.

"THAT BLOND CHICK'S A _DUDE_?!"

Half the room burst out laughing as a purple boot bounced off the back of KF's head.

_7. *points at Jericho* He doesn't like it when people call him "the-blond-chick-who's-really-a-dude." *dodges shoe*_


	4. Water

**Disclaimer: Like I said.**

_8. You will not refer to the evidence room as "the bat cave"._

_9. If Robin is in the ba-errr...evidence room, you should assume that he will not want to play football._

_10. If, by some strange twist of fate, he does want to play football, please remember that he is not Charlie Brown and therefore you should not pull the ball away right before he kicks it. He does not find it as funny as you do._

_11. you will not run around smacking Silkie with a blow up mallet. StarFire does not like people who smack Silkie with a blow up mallet._

"-and how was I supposed to know that you can't breathe chlorinated water?"

Aqualad glared at Speedy from one of the chairs next to the Jump City public pool.

"Simple. You ask yourself: "Is chlorine poisonis?".

_12. Never push Aqualad into a chlorinated body of water._


	5. Wakeup

**Disclaimer: (s) are a waist of time.**

_13. If you volunteer for babysitting duty, at least try to keep the tower in one piece (and may God have mercy on you)._

_14. The team leader's daily coffee time is their only opportunity to let off the stress of being the leaders, peace-keepers, tacticians, and, occasionally, the repairmen, as well as the ones responsible for maneuvering each team's group of (normally clashing) personalities to productive ends. In other words, God help the sucker who screws with their coffee time._

_15. Trying to swat Silkie with a giant fly swatter is not a good first impression._

* * *

It was a peacful early morning in Titans Tower (very early morning. About five AM). Of course, for the pranksters in the tower, this was unacceptable.

"WHO LET THE DOGS OUT? RUFF, RUFF RUFF RUFF RUFF! wHO LET THE DOGS OUT?"

A colective scream resounded throughout the tower, immidietly followed by another scream, this one of rage.

"BEAST BOY!"

* * *

_16. The song "Who Let The Dogs Out" blasted through the intercom will not be appreciated as a wakeup call._

_17. "Narwhals", "Numa Numa", "Hamster Dance", "Do You Like Waffles", "Witch Doctor", "The Llama Song", etc, are also not popular wakeup calls. _

_18. Don't put yourself in charge of choosing/timing wakeup calls._


	6. World War 3 Disaster Zone

**A/N: The obscurity of the categories that my first fic is in has left me unprepared for how many people have seen, favorited, followed, and reviewed this story. Excuse me while I pass out in amazement. *passes out***

**Disclaimer: Me no own.**

_19. Don't give Kid Flash or Mas y Menos too much sugar. It will end badly._

_20. Please participate in helping us keep our towers and emergency outposts well stocked with food that preferably has a far off expiration date. Also, it might interest you to know that Titans aren't *ahem* "required" to be sure of a foods freshness per-say..._

_21. Yeah, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of Raven's room, I shalt not live to tell the tale._

* * *

"Something tells me it was a bad idea to let Beast Boy babysit and pet-sit." Robin said as the front door opened to reveal the partially demolished, bite and scorch mark-riddled lobby.

Raven and Star Fire stood, motionless as statues, for about five minutes before zooming through the ceiling, one in a cloud of black energy, the other through a hole, both growling something that sounded like: "If he hurt my kids/bumgorf then he will pay and he will pay dearly."

Cyborg and Robin ran up the stairs, following the girls as fast as they could. Somehow, all four reached the main room at the same time.

"OH MY GOD!"

"WHAT THE *?"

"SWEET AZAR!"

"X'AHL!"

Melvin, Timmy, and Teether were sitting under the table with Silkie. As for the room itself, the nearby wall was dead, half the sofa was gone, the computer was now mainly scrap metal, the pipes were visible, the sink was teetering on the edge of the (broken) window, the light fixture was on the floor, and, on the other side of the room, Beast Boy had just finished extinguishing the stove.

He looked up.

He paled.

He laughed nervously.

"Hello."

_22. Don't leave Silkie/Another pet that may be acquired in the future/any titans under 12/Beast Boy unattended._

___23. Don't tamper with kitchen supplies or equipment, we are already on our fifteenth stove this month._


	7. Sponge

**Disclaimer: I don't own it. **

_24. No running inside (this means you, Kid Flash!)._

_25. If something gets through Cyborg's security, START PANICKING IMMEDIATELY!_

* * *

Bumblebee and the twins had prepared for the worst when Aqualad jumped off the "Ops balcony" into the pool and the sounds of frantic floundering had immediately followed, but they were most definitely unprepared for the sight of Aqualad reappearing at the top of the stairs, covered from head to toe in colorful bits of ripped-up sponge.

He flicked a bit of sponge of his shoulder.

"Where. Is. Speedy?"

_26. Do not fill the Titans East's pool with those insta-sponge creatures. THIS MEANS YOU SPEEDY!_

_27. Water must stay in the pipes and appliances at all times._


	8. Unnecessary

**A/N: ... My other story (The Oasis) has twice as many chapters than this... And this story has gotten more favorites, followers, views, and reviews in one day than The Oasis has gotten in the entire two months it's been up. Even allowing for the fact that it's in some obscure categories, that's still kind of sad.**

** Disclaimer: Nu uh.**

_28. If Jericho is playing his guitar on the roof, pushing him off is not a good idea._

_29. The above rule also applies to Raven when she is meditating._

_30. If it's pink, gelatinous, has green, ant-like insects imbedded in it, is covered in blue fur, and potentially alive, then please remove it from the refrigerator._

_31. Don't anger a fellow Titan when their restraining an enemy. As for why, see universal rule #1: "Don't tick off the guy who handles your food"_

* * *

"Hey, Robin." Robin looked up.

"Can people other than you and Bumblebee write rules?" Beastboy asked.

Robin thought for a moment.

"As long as their necessary, I don't see why not."

_32. Only record necessary rules on this list._

_33. No, Beast Boy, banning meat products from the tower is not a necessary rule._

_34. No, Cyborg, banning tofu from the tower is not a necessary rule, either._

_35. No, Aqualad, neither is banning seafood._


	9. Garage

**Disclaimer: No.**

_36. Do not bring seafood into the tower unless it's clearly distinguishable from Beast Boy's VEGETARIAN "seafood". (we have no way of knowing which fish products Aqualad is allergic to, and which ones he is just saying he is allergic to.)_

* * *

KABLOOM!

Everyone in the main room jumped.

"What was that?"

*down at the door to the garage*

Kid Flash was darting between the T-sub's launching tube and the rest of the garage, chanting: "Justfixitfast,noone'llknow. Justfixitfast,noone'llknow."

"Shut the heck up, Happy Feet!" Speedy shouted from the other side of the garage, where he was using the hose to spray the wall.

The door opened.

And Robin almost passed out.

The garage was on fire.

The two ketchup and mustered colored red-heads stared at the Boy Wonder.

Speedy leaned against the nearby work table, spinning the hose around, hoping that if he acted as if this was normal, then Robin would think he was dreaming.

"Uh, hi."

The floor underneath Speedy collapsed.

_37. Do not try to conceal a garage explosion and the subsequent mayhem resulting from it. Any attempt will be doomed to failure._


	10. Food Poisoning

**A/N: I used an online translator for Mas y Menos's speech. Since I put it through ****_two_**** translators, and put it ****_back through_**** one of the translators to double-check it, I think it's safe to say that any mistakes are not my fault.**

** Disclaimer: I don't own TT.**

** P.S. I don't care how you think Star talks; she addresses people by either using their name, or by calling them "Friend(s)". She does not, at any point in the series, use both forms of address at once.**

_38. Pranking people by running around screaming: "KID FLASH IS HIGH ON SUGAR!" is smart only if you have a death wish._

_39. In a fight, Aqualad will run toward any nearby bodies of water due to the rare phenomena called "common sense". Therefore, shouting "Aqualad, try to get to the water!" is neither necessary nor a sign of high intelligence._

* * *

Sept 18th, 12:33 PM:

"Kid Flash, would you like to try my homemade blursckuletch bread?"

KF looked at Star and thought for a moment. Correction, he looked at Star, and his head waged a brief and one-sided war with his stomach. As always, his stomach won.

"Sure, why not?"

Sept 18th, 1:18 PM:

"For once," Beast Boy said, grinning. "someone, somewhere in the world, was somehow a bigger idiot than me."

In the nearby hospital bed, a certain miserable speedster groaned in agony.

"Shut up Beast Boy."

* * *

Sept 30th, 7:03 AM:

"¡Cumpleaños feliz, señorita Bumblebee!"

"Happy birthday, Bee!"

These two well-wishers combined to make the first sound Bumblebee heard on her 19th birthday.

"Woh, you guys certainly did a better job this year then you did last year." Bee laughed, looking around her balloon and streamer-adorned room as visions of her last "birthday celebration" (coughcough a balloon, a piece of printer paper with "Happy B-day!" written in sharpy, and a cupcake with two candles shaped like a 1 and an 8 on it coughcough) danced through her head, before they were bulldozed down in favor of this year.

"Yeah, and M&M even got up early to make you pancakes." Speedy said, grinning.

"Aw, thanks you two." She said, rumpling the twins' hair.

Sept 30, 7:25 AM:

"We are _not_ letting The Twins help us make her birthday cake." Aqualad said vehemently as the Titans East sheepishly watched their leader get her stomach pumped.

* * *

Oct 7th, 10:01 PM:

"Alright dudes and dudets, get ready for MOVIE NIGHT!" Beast Boy cheered as the movie started.

"Wait," Hotspot said, turning to him. "if your here, who's making the popcorn?"

"Oh, Jericho offered to do it" Beast Boy said, already enraptured by the TV screen.

Oct 7th, 10:14 PM:

"How in God's name is it possible to ruin _microwave popcorn_?!" The Herald groaned as he and the rest of the Titans Movie Night participants glared at Jericho from behind the window in the sick bay.

* * *

etc...

_40. There is a list taped to the fridge. It lists which people are good at cooking and which people must be restrained from preparing food at all costs. Helping to reinforce this list will greatly benefit your and other people's health._


	11. Theme Song

**Disclaimer: Uh uh.**

_41. When Robin yells "Titans Go", resist the urge to yell "Titans Stop"._

* * *

"Titans," Robin shouted. "GO!"

Kid Flash started to run into battle, then smirked evilly as an idea occurred to him.

"NANANANANANANANA BATMA-"

Sh-king.

And that is the story of how Kid Flash got pinned to the wall by five birderangs.

_42. No one cares how funny you think it is. Singing the Batman theme song every time Robin does his "ninja thing" got old over a year ago._


	12. Atlanean Aggravation

**A/N: The following events took place about 15 minutes-an hour or more apart.**

**Disclaimer: I swear, one of these days, I WILL find a way to obtain the Teen Titans.**

_43. No, Robin does NOT glue his mask to his face._

* * *

DACD (Drive Aqualad Crazy Day) at Titans Tower:

"Hey, AL, could you tell me where the best fishing spots are?" Aqualad froze, then turned slowly to face the one who had dared to speak such horror.

Jinx grinned from the other side of the room.

"Don't worry, Twinkletoes, I'll make sure not to let Beast Boy make a speech at your funeral."

* * *

About fifteen minutes later, raised voices could be heard outside, two of them sounding somewhat cheerful, the last one, not so much.

The other Titans glanced casually out the window as a water jet erupted from below, topped by two red-and-yellow blurs.

"There goes Shafty and Happy Feet."

* * *

"For the last time," Aqualad sighed as he noticed Beast Boy coming toward him with a deck of paying cards and a sadistic smile. "I already know how to play that atrociously named game "Go Fish"."

* * *

"You know, I think I recently heard AL saying that his lungs had started to occasionally feel like their burning."

Bumblebee turned to Speedy, a concerned frown forming on her lips.

"Really? When?"

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Bee jumped as she heard the scream of pain sounding from the pool.

Speedy grinned.

"Just now."

"Did you replace the pool water with Mountain Dew again?"

"Maybe."

* * *

"I'M GONNA KILL THOSE THREE!" Aqualad screamed as he flailed around after accidentally jumping in the Titans East's new "foam pit".

* * *

"Photo Op!" Kid flash shouted as he snapped a picture of the white fluff-covered, royally ticked-off Atlantean.

* * *

AL had retreated to the roof, the last sanctuary he could think of. Walking cautiously to the edge of the roof, he leaned against a nearby pole and wondered how soon he could leave for a visit to Atlantis without being impolite.

Then he heard a rustling noise behind him.

_"Oh no."_

*in the main room*

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"RETERN TO THE SEA, LITTLE FISHY!"

Everyone's heads whipped toward the window as a blue and black blur dropped past it. Then shot back up past it atop a massive jet of water as the blur screamed: "THAT'S IT! THAT IS THE LAST STRAW!"

_44. Do not ask Aqualad where the best fishing spots are._

_45. Do not insist on teaching Aqualad how to fish._

_46. Do not insist on teaching Aqualad how to play "go fish"._

_47. Do not replace the water in the Titans East's pool with soda._

_48. Do not replace the water in the Titans East's pool with foam blocks._

_49. Do not replace the water in the Titans East's pool with marshmallow fluff and take pictures of the "snowman" that comes out after Aqualad jumps in._

___50. When Aqualad is on the roof of the Teen Titans/Titans East's tower, don't shove him off and scream "RETERN TO THE SEA, LITTLE FISHY!". He won't understand why it's so funny no matter how you explain it (if he lets you explain). _

_(Note from Speedy: having recordings of the afor-mentioned event(s) and sending them to his friends back in Atlantis, however, is perfectly fine.)_


	13. Bullseye NOT

**A/N: My mom gives me back my computer for the first time in two months, and THIS is all I can come up with. I suck. **

** Disclaimer: No, I don't own them, and that's probably a good thing. **

It was a beautiful day in Jump City, and there were giant, 15 foot tall bunnies, doves, playing cards, and gloves hopping around all over the place. Yep. You heard me right. apparently, Mumbo Jumbo had been experimenting with his magic a great deal recently. This mayhem was the result. Although it had taken a reasonably small amount of time to subdue the magician himself, the "amazing" effects of his field day were causing so much trouble that the Titans had had to call the Titans East for help. Thus, the TE-Ship's current position hovering above the city.

"I think this is the last pack." Speedy shouted over his headset as he fired at the pack (herd?) of giant rabbits.

"Only five left... four... three... two... o- HOLY *language omitted for the twins' sake*" Speedy screamed with the rest of his team as Aqualad (the driver) swerved to avoid a stray mega-dove, the last arrow flying off to who knew where (or possibly to its intended target, considering the archer's skill).

_"Did you hit it?" _Speedy blinked and wormed his way into an upright, forward-faceing position so he could look back as Bumblebee's voice snapped him out of his slight daze.

"I don't know, he's still hopping."

_"So are the other four, it probably just takes a while to-"_

_ "Bee."_ Speedy and Bumblebee's heads whipped toward the front of the ship at the Atlantean's interjection, the slight tinge of panic in his voice and the worrying way he was holding his shoulder immediately igniting their concern.

Then the blood drained from their faces as they realized where Speedy's last tranquilizer arrow had gone.

_51. First rule of flying a T-ship, you NEVER shoot the pilot._


	14. Buttons

**A/N: I have returned! And this time, I have enough extra time to actually acknowledge some of the commenters.**

** stormiXbaby: I'm actually planning on making a "Drive *insert name here* crazy day for every Titan, so say no more, your request is already in the works. :)**

**... True, it will probably take a while to finish, but one day. One day. **

** TheDarkQueenOfRandomness: Dang, your right. I've been terrible to him in the past few chapters, haven't I? :( Well, he'll get a break eventually. ...Not today, though. X)**

** And to everyone who has said that they like this fic: Thank you so much. I have no words. Please take this update as a token of my gratitude. :)**

** Disclaimer: Did the final season end on a cliffhanger? 'Nuff said.**

Bumblebee grinned as she finished test-driving the newly rebuilt TE ship.

"The new ship drives like a charm, Cy."

_"Was there ever a doubt?"_

_ "Well, considering we were just in a fairly serious accident in one of these things..." _Speedy drawled from the pod to Bee's left.

_"Yeah, well, that was because Aqualad crashed it."_

"Actually," Bumblebee corrected him. "Clownfish over there just happened to be driving at the time. _Speedy_ was the one who crashed it."

_"Eh?"_

"Long story. I'll explain later."

_"Hey señorita Bumblebee, ¿Que hace está botón rojo grande?"_

It took Bee a few (precious) seconds to mentally translate Mas's question. Fortunatly, Aqualad, the most fluent Spanish speaker out of the older members of Titans East, did not need that long.

_ "Mas, NO!"_

Unfortunatly, his warning was ignored, and the button was pushed.

** "Emergency shutdown engaged"**

"Oh God, really?!" Bumblebee shouted as she frantically tried to restart the T-ship. "Why would you make a button that turns off the _whole T-ship _while it's still in the air?!"

_ "Better question,"_ Speedy shouted. _"if everything in our T-ship is in the original T-ship too, how the heck did that team survive so long with a button like _that_ in a place that BEAST BOY was around on a regular basis?!"_

_ "¡No se preocupe, encontré un botón verde! ¡Aquellos fijan todo!"_

Again, it was fortunate that Aqualad was the most fluent at Spanish.

_ "Menos, NO!"_

And again, he was ignored, and a button was pushed.

Suffice it to say that when it was all over, Cyborg immediately started making major changes to the emergency shutdown mechanism.

* * *

A few weeks later, Kid flash asked Aqualad to drive him down to the grocery store to help him pick up some of the necessities that the Titans had run out of (meaning everything). This being the day his team was going to be test driving their latest newly rebuilt TE-ship, Aqualad readily agreed. This was his first mistake. His second mistake was taking the TE-car- or any car that Cyborg had already gotten his hands on, for that matter. His third mistake was in not seeing a problem with letting Kid Flash drive them home.

"Why isn't the jet-speed-whatever-it-is turning off?!" KF screamed as he repeatedly pounded one of the buttons on the dashboard.

"Maybe because your pressing the "on" button, perhaps?!" His poor passenger shouted as he held on for dear life.

KF looked at the dashboard.

"Oh. Well, how was I supposed to know that?" He said as he reached for another button.

AL sighed.

"Well, it certainly couldn't have been because it was green with the word "ON" printed on it in capital letter- NO! DON'T PRESS THAT BUTTON! THAT'S THE SELF-DESTRUCT BUTTON!"

"Well, sorry! How am I supposed to know these things?"

"HAPPY FEET, TURN THE JET SPEED FEATURE OFF RIGHT NOW!"

"Huh, what? Why- OH CRUD!"

Screech.

Crash.

"I turned it off." Kid Flash proudly stated to his wide-eyed, hyperventilating passenger.

Aqualad took a deep, shaky breath.

"Yes Flash, you did. But did you forget something?"

The red-head frowned in confusion, glancing around at their surroundings.

"I don't think so."

"You forgot to open the garage door."

A short pause.

"Oh yeeeaaaah."

"And where are we now?"

Kid Flash slid down in the drivers seat, shutting his eyes as a sheepish grin formed on his face, accompanied by a deep red blush.

"In the garage."

* * *

_52. Never press the big red button._

_53. The big green button is not always a good button._

_54. If you're trying to turn something on, pressing the big red button with "OFF" printed on it will not work._

_55_._ If you're trying to turn something off, pressing the big green button with "ON" printed on it will not work._

_56. The yellow and black button that has "DANGER", "SELF DESTRUCT" or a skull and crossbones printed on it isn't likely to work either._


	15. Capes

**A/N: I know this chapter is stupid and immature and probably not funny, but I couldn't resist! XD Sorry for being so lazy about updating, but I just got into a new fandom (I am hopelessly in love with Rise of the Guardians and Guardians of Childhood, a children's movie and book series, and I'm proud of it!), and my mom is still holding my computer hostage, so all in all it's been hard to get into the mood to write anything Teen Titans-related lately. **

**And once again, a big thank you to all who have reviewed! You guys are the reason I still have the energy to upload anything right now (what with my limited access to my computer and all), and I hope that this chapter won't disappoint! :) **

**Disclaimer: Nope, and that's probably a good thing.**

* * *

"I'm not saying everything it says is right, I'm just saying this movie makes some points that you might want to know about." Robin sighed and rubbed his forehead. It was going to be one of _those _days.

"Kid, I admit that sometimes you notice things that are actually useful, but if something involving superheroes was _so_ obvious that it was mentioned on a children's movie like "The Incredibles", then I think I would've noticed it before now." He said, gesturing to the TV screen where Melvin, Timmy, and the Twins were watching said movie while Teether chewed on the rug.

Kid flash frowned. "But Rob, I really don't-"

"KF," Robin sighed as he was on his way out of the room. "Tell you what; if you can find and prove one "point" that this movie makes, then I'll watch it with you and try to take it seriously."

"If the point I choose affects more than one person, will you try to get them to watch it too?"

"… Sure."

And even though he told himself he didn't believe in signs or omens, Robin couldn't shake the feeling of dread he felt when he realized that, when KF grinned demoniacally right before Robin left, explosions from the movie could be heard in the background.

* * *

Two days later, Kid Flash popped in a DVD and settled onto the couch with Raven (whose cloak was slightly mangled at the bottom), The Herald (whose cape was stretched out and deformed to an impressive degree), and Robin (who was covered in scratches and bruises, and whose cape also seemed to have taken a recent and equally intense beating).

"So you guys will all watch this willingly, in exchange for me never speaking of this again. Agreed?"

KF's hapless victims muttered a grudging agreement as KF turned on the TV.

"Alrighty then." Kid Flash chirped as he pressed the necessary buttons to start the DVD.

"And remember everyone," He said with the same sadistic grin that Robin was kicking himself for not paying attention to earlier. "No capes."

For some reason, Kid Flash was strangely absent while the trio was watching the movie.

_57. Don't chop up the bottom of someone's cape with a giant fan just to prove a point. _

_58. Don't hang someone on a flagpole by their cape just to prove a point. _

_59. Don't close a car door on someone's cape and drive a short distance while dragging them along outside the car just to prove a point._

_ 60. Don't try to apply something from a kid's movie to real life._

_Note from Kid Flash *written in pencil*: You're all just mad 'cause I was right!_


End file.
